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What exactly is self-inquiry?

March 29, 2018

What exactly is self-inquiry?


What exactly is self-inquiry? How does it transform oneself?

When the concept of alchemical transformation came to me first, I scoffed at its notion. The concept of a common lead changing into an expensive material was an absurd one to me. Even when I knew concept was applied to human spirit, I denied the possibility. To transform oneself, one has to take risks and greater challenges. I never liked the idea of taking risks. I had heard tales of great minds who revolutionized this world. Yet I never let the notion of such people being common people deceive me. You are either born with this talent where you excel in some particular discipline, or you spend your life like a normal individual. The idea where one takes huge risks without knowing the future was absurd to me. I liked walking down the already paved path. Why invent the wheel again?

And when that reckoning came to me, I realized how wrong I was. Without risks, we don't succeed. Without risks, there is no evolution. Whether one likes it or not, evolution is fundamental of survival and something even better, the quality of adaptation. When the awakening comes from within, the fear of change slowly fades away. One has to travel the paths unknown to sow what has never been reaped before. One has to take the dangerous roads or be ready to dive in dangerous waters. This risk taking hides the spark of living in it. This is because when one accepts change, one precedes the step of becoming better version of self.

I would not turn towards the self-inquiry until the big loss occurred in my life. I had two options. One was to let the sorrow take its effect, eat me from inside. And yet I found myself persevering, like always. People fail not because of lack of passion, but because lack of commitment. So I committed myself to finding the truth. When one controls oneself, the world starts responding. Initially when I started this journey, I found myself only on receiving end of all the pain and hardships. I was supposed to focus on myself only for my inquiry. And yet I didn’t see one thing. The process of self-inquiry was changing me. I found myself opening to big changes within my life. The rewards of being self-dependant and free from inside are hard to earn. Yet it is these rewards which are exhilarating. The self-inquiry was the biggest change and biggest reward I could give my life. For factors which apparently stressed me out, I found myself ignoring what couldn’t be controlled. I didn’t succeed or gained riches in one life. I gained something far more valuable, the quality of perseverance. If it was success, it didn’t get to my head. If it was failure, it didn’t get to my heart. I found myself keeping on daring. And that is when I started to live again!

There is a lot more which this road can offer me. I have still much to learn. And here is where my journey truly starts. I am but a novice ending one chapter and beginning another one. The lesson of initiation of self inquiry is over and new one starts!

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